by Mamoudou N’Diaye

Cool as a fan!

Last night at 10:43pm, DeAndre Temple, star high school quarterback with a full ride scholarship to The Ohio State University, was in for a surprise when he was stopped by an NYPD patrol on Staten Island, processed, and let go, all within 5 minutes.

“I really thought this was it,” Temple said, “I saw my life flash before my eyes when I heard the officer call my name, because, you know…history. I was in a hoodie and everything.”

Temple was four blocks from his house, carrying a bag containing only Flamin Hot Cheetos, an Arizona Iced Tea, and a pack of gum when NYPD officers responded to a distress call in the neighborhood.

“I have a folder on my desktop full of photos for CNN to use if a situation like this with cops arises. I’m 18 but I was always raised to plan for my future,” Temple said. “The officer asked where I was going, asked how I was doing, offered me a ride home which I declined, told me to have a good night, and went on his way.”

Temple’s mother, Bernadette Morrison, was also confused.

“DeAndre was on the phone and said “Momma, I’m going to have to call you back” so I immediately started  planning a vigil. Like I had pictures printing at Kinko’s and everything.” Morrison said.  “Imagine my surprise when DeAndre walks in. We’re just not used to the police letting us be anymore.”

The officer in question, Blake Ross, was unaware he had done anything out of the ordinary.

“I responded to a distress call, offered a kid a ride home, and went on my way,” Ross said. “ Kid seemed dope, good head on his shoulders, just didn’t want him tangling with anyone dangerous. ‘Serve and protect’ means something to me!”

Officer Ross was put on administrative leave by the 110th Precinct for “doing his job” on Monday, a move reminiscent of President Trump’s firing of Sally Yates and James Comey.

More on this story as it develops.